Our Mission
Welcome! Thank you for stopping by. I am so excited to connect with you. You may be wondering what this site is all about. Well, it’s about helping you step into your greatness and creating “The Boomerous Life”. If you are a baby boomer, this site is for you. Here’s a deeper look into my mission.
I want to help women find what they want to do with the rest of their lives. Many of us in these years don’t even know who we are, after being consumed by years of family and career. When we face losses of a spouse or job, some of us are completely lost – “What now?” Hobbies and leisure time were not even engaged in. Deep within us is a yearning, a need to be alive, to even PLAY again or to make a difference.
In some cases, part of the discovery is to learn how to make some more money doing something that is less stressful. We want to do something, but not in such a mad driven, consuming way or by doing what others define for us. There, also, is a need for something gentle, to wash over us – less worry, peace…. Some of us actually need permission to do nothing – simplify our lives, throw away the guilt, learn to say “No”, learn to quiet the chatter in our minds, ….
Yet, some women find themselves the caregivers to grand kids, a sick spouse or aging parent. The cycle hasn’t stopped, so sometimes there’s a fear that time will run out before we’ve had some FUN, true companionship with other people, a deeper relationship with those we love and a real reason to get up in the morning. These are the women I want to help find what excites them and gives them the answers and plan that they can actually control. In a changing world and in a finite time of greater uncertainty, these questions about life can perhaps be the hardest we’ve ever had to answer.
If you found that my mission resonates with you, then I want to sincerely meet and connect with you. Please share your thoughts below.
I look forward to sharing with you again very soon!
To Your Boomerous Life,
Margaret Adamson
Lonely You are not alone
Today my blog came out of a dear friend’s misfortune. Due to heavy rain during the past two days, her basement flooded causing the cancellation of an invitation to lunch at her house. I had been really looking forward to visiting friends, who I see only occasionally.
The stereotype imagine of retirees sipping coffee around tables at Tim Hortons or over pot luck lunches, isn’t the image I’m referring to. It goes far beyond those lattes and double-doubles that get people out of their houses.
According to the authors of The Lonely American: Drifting Apart in the Twenty-First Century, admitting to loneliness, is not something anyone readily admits to. I, for one, confess to feeling inadequate when I’m lonely.
Today millions of people live in cities, yet they don’t know their neighbours. We’re all busy and have come to value the importance of being busy. I’m sure you’ve heard someone say, “I’ve been so busy, ….” “My ___ is so busy, I hardly see or talk to him/her.” It has become an accepted, even respected, reason for the lack of contact. Heaven forbid that one should suggest that being busy is no excuse for absence. Heaven forbid that one should go further to say it is uncaring or self-centred. It might only reflect that you have nothing to do or don’t understand. So, we continue to communicate via texting, cellphones and computers, rather than person-to-person and heart-to-heart conversations.
At mid-life and beyond, there are many reasons for one’s social circle to have shrunk – divorce, death, location, empty nests, …. In addition, some boomers have become totally committed to being caregivers to grandkids, elderly parents or sick spouses, so they have little-to-no time or opportunity to extend themselves more for their own needs and occasional visits with their friends. It’s little wonder that the number of lonely people is growing..
In an interesting article, “One is the loneliness number”. written by Richard Handler, CBC News, he sited a Duke University report (1985-2004), in which the researchers found that “the number of confidants with whom the average person discussed personal and important matters dropped from three to two. More importantly the number of people, who said there was no one with whom they have discussed important matters, tripled. Individuals without a single confidant now make up nearly a quarter of those surveyed.”
This statistic I find especially worrisome, as the need to have people in your personal life, is fundamental to one’s well being. No matter what age!!! Having seen hundreds of children form friendships in their school years, nothing was more gut wrenching than seeing a child alone – just never finding someone to call a true, stick-to-you friend.
That need really never changes – for some people it is a fear they think about more as they envision growing OLD and dependent on others for help and companionship.
Prior to retirement or transitions, I cannot stress enough importance to giving great thought to “WHO ARE THE WARM BODIES IN YOUR LIFE?” Do the simple exercise of an inventory for all your family, friends, acquaintances, work associates or colleagues. Yes, a list of all the good, the bad and the ugly! Next, examine – who do you like being with? Why? Research reveals that it is not about the number of “friends”, but rather about the closeness or connection we feel with those we actually interact with. If you’re lucky enough to belong to a strong extended family or ethnic community, this likely will never be an exercise you’d entertain or have to do. I have seen these groups rally to the aid and support of a member in unexpected need.
So, what is the glue that bonds people? For life time friends that is usually simply a history or shared experiences. For those of us with children, we keep nurturing the care and strength of family – if possible.
Making friends in our later years usually is harder, but unlike an innocent, naive child we have years of experience to know where to start. Such starting points may come from looking at and deciding:
Almost last of all, I have always believed that when we look into the eyes of another person we hear them better. Try to ignore their cell phone and your’s, too.
On that final note, lots of love and never give up believing that there are new, welcoming people just around the corner of your journey.
Everyone was born to give something to others.
To Your Boomerous Life,
Margaret Adamson
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