I go back and forth between thinking that my spouse and I need to communicate and be completely transparent with each other so that our trust level and relationship can grow vs. thinking that I need to be wise and hide some things from him because if he really knew all about me then he would feel too safe, would get bored and will go find his adventure somewhere else. I’m still not sure which one is the right answer, but I do know that when you hide things, it gives Satan a foothold. It allows him to come in and whisper lies in your ear like, “he doesn’t really love you and he never did” or “you are completely worthless and your husband knows it, so you need to pretend”. I’ve always went with transparency in the past and it hasn’t served me too well, but with this different way I find myself wanting to sin more and slowly wanting to distance myself from him, I don’t think it is good either. Maybe I’ll just go with transparency and hope that he chooses me despite his boredom….or is that stupid? Still don’t know.
If resentment, anger and hostility gain a foothold in your life, they will diminish your effectiveness for God
I was once scheduled to speak at an annual women's conference at the Potter's House in Dallas. Before I arrived, I prepared the teaching I planned to give, "Is There a Lady in the House?" in which I describe two kinds of women: the industrious one lauded in Proverbs 31 and the "keeper at home" Paul writes about in Titus 2. But just as I was getting up to preach, the Lord told me, "You can't preach that message tonight."
At first I tried to convince Him to change His mind. But He reminded me that I was on assignment. I knew I had to say whatever He instructed, empowered and encouraged me to say--regardless of the risk or cost. And He wanted me to ask not "Is there a lady in the house?" but "Is there bitterness in the house?"
A Root of BitternessWhy bitterness? Because we cannot be the women God desires us to be when there is a root of bitterness in our souls.
You know what bitterness in the natural is. Something that leaves an acrid, lingering taste in your mouth. Something that is unpleasant, distasteful, galling and unpalatable.
Bitterness of soul is also unpleasant. It develops as a result of facing something that is grievous, difficult to accept or extremely painful. It is marked by harshness, resentment and deep animosity. And it sounds something like this: